The Fatman Chronicles – Volume III

In the past it didn’t take much for me to abandon a new workout routine or a new diet. In fact I now wonder how many times I subconsciously manufactured reasons to fail. Looking back I can remember dozens of times of falling off the “fat wagon” and just how pitiful the reasons for doing so were.

No Excuses

As a fat guy it doesn’t take much to become defeated. A sniffle here and there and all of a sudden I am too sick to work out. It didn’t take much, a headache, sore muscles or my all time favorite, I ate too much too work out. How sad is that? I ate so much I was able to insanely justify that as an excuse for not working out.

One of the crazier patterns I would fall into was something I like to call the “fair weather fatman syndrome.” You know the story. It is either too cold or too hot to workout. In the dead of winter I would be okay with doing absolutely nothing because it is too cold, never mind the $700 treadmill in my room or the $500 Total Gym clone leaning against the wall. It is just too cold. Soon enough summertime comes and it is too hot. That noise? Oh that is air conditioner. We like our house at a comfortable 72 degrees.

What is really crazy is I could come up with an excuse to not start a workout routine. You see, I need shoes. Or maybe I need special gloves. Or maybe I need this gadget or that gizmo. As soon as I have that I will be on my way. No holding me back this time honey you just wait and see. Once I have that thingy, I will be a slim in a month, says the 300lb fatman.

So what is different this time you ask? Well I don’t know for sure but there is something… I can’t put my finger on it just yet. It seems as if before it was all of the reasons why I can’t workout. Previously when I bumped into something I could not do in a workout I would skip it. I couldn’t do it so I wouldn’t And if something hurt too much, eventually I would stop doing that as well. I think being so uncomfortable during the workout played a huge role in me avoiding the workout all together.

DDPYoga is different, if I encounter something I can’t do I can immediately find a modification that I can do. I am not skipping things and I am definitely not hurting myself. Like DDP said, “Pain is PAIN.” I am trying to alleviate pain not create more. Maybe that is it, DDPYoga is showing me how to workout doing things I can actually do. When I fire up one of the DVD’s appropriate for my level, I know I can complete the workout.

It feels real good to know in the last 18 days I have had more days of double workouts than single workouts. It also feels real good to know I have only taken off a couple of rest days. I guess what I am trying to say is right now I feel really good and I have no reason to not do my DDPYoga again tomorrow!

The Fatman Chronicles – Volume II

There is a bittersweet moment when you finally give in to the fact that you have to shop at the Big and Tall store. On one hand you realize “Yep, I’m that guy. I am so far gone that I now have to shop at a special store, the one that caters to the LARGE crowd.” On the other hand you are finally in a store where the clothes will actually fit!

Before you get to that Big and Tall a-ha moment, shopping for clothes sucks. I mean it really sucks. Most major department stores rarely stock anything above a XXL and when they do, it is a damn slim XXXL. Most fat guys wandering around the men’s section of a major department store are not looking for a certain style or color. They are looking for those X’s baby.

When I was stumbling around the men’s section looking like a lost child I never abandon my sense of fashion. Unfortunately that sense of style had to take a back seat to available size. Of course there would always be the dreaded thought “Try it on, it might fit.” Hell the thing looks huge on the hanger, it has to fit. Off I would tread to the dressing room with 2-3 items only to be hit in the face with reality once more. The days of XXL have long since passed.

When I moved on from 2X to 3X I told myself, it is for “comfort” and “I like baggy clothes”. Then time marches on and some of those 3X’s have shrunk a bit (yeah they shrunk) and I found myself doing what I call the tee-shirt pop. Oh you are not familiar with the tee-shirt pop? Let me break it down for you. The tee-shirt pop is where you put your shirt over your head, shoulders and gut. You leave your arms inside of the shirt and you S…T…R…E…T…C…H that sucker out. Remember it shrunk a bit and I like baggy clothes.

Then it happens, you find those 3X shirts just aren’t as baggy and maybe you should give that 4X a try. I like baggy and this thing has a nice feel to it. The shirt kind of hangs off of me and the lumps and the bumps aren’t so pronounced. Man oh man what a slippery slope that can become. I have one 4X shirt and that b**** will be my last. I am working hard to make my 3X shirts baggy once again. For my birthday in April I will wear 2X comfortably. How is this for a major proclamation.

I am thankful that Arthur’s video sparked an idea that took a few months to ignite. That lowly spark has now become a flame that burns hotter each day. I am on my way folks and I am going to get there with a BANG!

Remember, as a famous comedian once said “It is called Big and Tall but there are never any tall guys shopping there!”

The Fatman Chronicles – Enter the Fatman

For some time I have been a member over at Team DDPYoga. I did a bit of blogging there and I will be relocating some of those posts here to my site. I started a series called the Fatman Chronicles which will be the first posts out of the shoot. Without further ado below is the first post from that series.

In the not too distant past I was an avid blogger. I would post 3-4 days a week based around one of my old hobbies. I think I am going to use that previous blog time here focusing on my health. So today begins the Fatman Chronicles!

This will be different from my progress posts. Here I will write about things to help keep me motivated. I am sure I will delve into a wide range of topics so nothing will be sacred lol.
Today’s Topic……….

Tying Shoe

Tying My Shoes

Tying my shoes!
No really, it is! Why you ask? Because it is something that I absolutely hate as a fat guy. Who would of thought that something so simple could be so dreaded. I am not sure about you but there was a time not to long ago when I would huff and puff and
S… T… R… A… I… N
just to get my shoes tied. It was pure hell. It even got to the point to where I would “pre-tie” my shoes and then slip them on. I can remember one day watching a co-worker bend right over and tie his shoes like it was nothing. That son-of-a B**** I thought. Man if only it was so easy. Well. Soon enough with some discipline, clean eating and a lot of DDPYoga I am going to make those shoe laces my b****! That’s right I said it. Just so ya know, the Fatman Chronicles will be rated “R”.

So because of those dreaded shoe laces I ask you, “did you do your yoga today?”
Kauzmo – Lance